Drunk Dial

I'm so glad phones don't auto dial if you gaze at a photo too long. 

Fat

I mean, I'd say it's in your best interest to not sleep with people (again)who tell you you're chubby after the sleeping is done.
Probably don't call them either.

When I...

When I grow up....

A thought I've had every year about the next and the 1- 50 that will follow year one- has changed since I let Mr.  Murray go.

Today,

When I grow up and everyday until I do, I know it won't be easy, but imma love.

K.
Hi.

So there's that

I started to think of my life with you in it.
In big ways.
Only in my dreams.
Sleeping.
Arms around me.
Around my waist.
Around our baby. 
And I don't love you.

This is how we love.

She couldn't let the world know her.
So she went there, where the sheets weren't cleaned and the pillows cases were dried with stains from other times.
Where she proved that in the dark of the crown moulding, that every seem cracks and sometimes water and other things creep in and leave stains.
High above where we can reach
And that's where tears and truth were safe.
Where orgasms bellowed off of from all the men she wouldn't let know her.
Where her child would weep and laugh and jump.
Where she would be quiet. And sometimes so still.
Where she was raw and human and wildly and abundantly alone, but rarely without company.
Because even when alone, was not always in good company.

Staring

Sometimes, don't you want to stare?
Just look so hard.

Maybe not know, but just see. As it is, as it is being, as they show you they are..?

Sometimes I just want to watch.

And request that you don't look back.

Thoughts on Telling the Truth

If you say that you always tell the truth, even if someone doesn't want to hear it, but you wont be honest about your feelings, what exactly is it that you're always so truthful about?
How I can I trust you if you aren't truthful about what matters the most, your heart; and how can I trust that you would honor my feelings when you aren't truthful with your own?